A Good Man

(Copyright © Jack Cain 2017, text and images)

[In this session, Nadyezhda continues to work on an emotional release from the series of traumas and physical interventions that have plagued her life including a surgical intervention, a skin graft, just three weeks before this session that did not go well.]

Nadyezhda: I start to see a person in the room. It’s a dark figure – a man with a cloak and nineteenth century costume. He’s wearing a hat. [pause]

Jack: All right. We’ll have to see what his role is here. Is the dark figure threatening?

Nadyezhda: Not so far. He’s a person who’s familiar to me. I don’t know what our relationship is yet… He’s someone I work with or he’s someone I can engage with normally.

Jack: Since he’s a dark figure I wonder if he can help you with the darkness.

Nadyezhda: I think he has the strength. Maybe he has the capacity to be like a knight. Maybe he can help me. He has strong arms. [pause]

I ask him, “Where can we go?”

“We’ll go to the sea,” he says. “We’re taking a boat across the sea.”

“Where should we go?” I ask.

Well, the landing is there within our sight. We can see the coastline and the trees and the sky. It’s golden at the edge because it’s twilight or dawn. We’re going to approach this place where the trees are and get off there.

And there’s going to be a cave. It’s a deep cave. We go inside. There are things on the walls – mineral growths. We go inside the cave and it’s immense. It was a small opening but inside it’s immense. It’s somewhat frightening with dark black and blue everywhere.

This is the kind of freedom I want. I want to go and explore these places. The cave is foreboding. It’s a little frightening but if I have a companion I can be there more safely.

Jack: You still have a lantern too don’t you?

Nadyezhda: Yes, I have a lantern.

It’s a bit frightening with these things that are hanging off the walls but… He has a sort of plan. I want to see these places down under. I want to know the Earth. Travel everywhere.

I’m asking to be released. “Release me from my affliction so I can be free to move around, free to travel and understand everything that I need to see on the planet in my short life. I need that. I need to be free from affliction once and for all.”

I hold his hand and I’m asking him, “Can you help me?” He’s a good man. I think I love him. I care for him. He’s a dark and strong figure. [sigh]

We can go into the depths together and find something.

I see the water inside the cave. There’s a shark in the waters.

And the sounds of the cave too – the dripping.

Jack: Yes, the sounds are very special in an immense space like that too.

Nadyezhda: Yes.

We have the torches. The torches can light us, help us find the correct path. Can I see the ground that I’m walking on? It’s sort of a narrow bridge passage. It’s very elevated. Different colors on the walls of the caves. [pause]

[sigh] And I say again, “I want to be whole. I want to be free.”

And I see myself. I don’t look like the way I do now. I look the way I looked before this surgery. I believe that’s the way I should look, it’s my correct form, the form that my body has taken. Even with the old scars, I don’t mind. Not this way. It’s not right. I’ve been inverted, I’ve been erased, I’ve been defaced somehow. It’s not good to feel this way.

[sigh] And so we go. And now that I’ve had time to observe these features of the cave I wonder what’s next, where I’m going.

So we get into a little rowboat and stay on the surface of the water as we’re going through the caves more deeply.

Jack: Yes, we’re looking for what you need to find. Something very deep at the root of your difficulty.

Nadyezhda: So we go through a passage and then we see a landing. There are many people and there are torches on the walls. A lot of people are gathered.

I’m asking can they tell us the source of my affliction and can they find me the way back to living the way that I want to. This is the question I’m asking. Can I become whole? I’m saying, “This is why we came here. This is what we’re after.” [pause]

I just had a brief flash of myself when I was here waiting for the bus once and I was holding the scarf in the wind and letting it billow up like a parachute. It was very beautiful. A moment of freedom.

So we should get out of the boat and leave. We go through the crowd, looking for a person. It’s an old man. He has an old wrinkled face and he’s bent over and he’s walking with a walking stick. So I should sit down with him and everyone is sitting around us. We have to have this discussion. I say, “Can you show me an image of something so I can understand what’s happening, what’s happening here?”

I just see a purple dress. I don’t know if I’m wearing it or someone’s wearing it. [pause]

I guess I just try to connect to the scene and see the flames flickering on the walls.

Jack: But you’ve asked him something specific, right?

Nadyezhda: Yes. An image of something.

Jack: Give it time. Yes, it could be many things. It could be words, it could be an image.

Nadyezhda: I’m just trying to keep myself in that place and absorb what is around me, what’s happening around me. The sensation of the coolness of the water. The relative warmth of the gathering of people and the torches.

He refers to a mutilation scene. There’s a person being mutilated.

I tell him, “I don’t need to see anything or relive or revisit anything. It’s already happened.” [pause]

I’m just sitting there still.

Jack: You’re still with him?

Nadyezhda: Yes.

Jack: Well, I think the fact that there was a mutilation scene means he understands what you’re talking about. Maybe there’s something that needs to be sacrificed. Sacrifice means to make holy.

Nadyezhda: I tell him I would sacrifice my skin graft. You can take it. I don’t want this thing that’s in the way of me. I can sacrifice my wounds. You can take them. I don’t need them. We can pull these out of my body. But maybe it’s better that he tells me.

Jack: Yes. It needs to come from him. But it’s good for you to make your desires clear – which you’ve done. And it’s helpful that all the people are gathered around you and that you have their energy as well. And you have the man who’s helping you.

Nadyezhda: And I tell him, “We need to move forward.”

Jack: Maybe he could show you the way.

Nadyezhda: He shows me a blue crystal globe.

Jack: Ah. Interesting.

Nadyezhda: I see a point of light on the globe. [pause]

So through the globe I see somewhere out in the mountains outside someone is carrying a black-faced sheep. [pause]

I’m carrying the sheep.

Jack: Ah. You have the sheep in your arms.

Nadyezhda: It’s also a baby. I’m also taking a baby.

I don’t know where to go, what to do.

Jack: Maybe you can still ask him even though that’s not where you are.

You’re still with him even though you’re looking through the globe, right?

Nadyezhda: Yes. [big breath in]

Jack: You maybe need a bit more information about what needs to happen next. He should still be able to help you. [pause]

Nadyezhda: So I say, “What should I do with this baby?”

He replies, “Nourish. Nourish the baby.” [pause]

“Feed it.”

Jack: So, how will you go about doing that?

Nadyezhda: [sigh] I don’t know… Like a mother. With tenderness.

Jack: Yes. Tenderness is nourishment.

Nadyezhda: Everything starts to go white. Like it’s washing away in milk or something.

I’m asking, “How can I drop my unnatural cloak, my unnatural vestments? The unnatural clothing that I have in this life. How can I become natural?

I feel frustrated. [sigh]

I just see the whiteness washing everything. Clouds, ocean, whiteness. It’s just a fog. A penetrating fog taking everything over. [pause]

I think this can be a good sensation. [pause]

Jack: There’s nothing dark about it right?

Nadyezhda: It’s very integrating; it’s like an ocean mist. [pause]

I feel that I have these things happening but the answer is not there yet. I haven’t become fully aware of where I need to go.

Maybe my unconscious wants to avoid something and that’s all right. By conferring it differently we can solve it differently. Maybe it doesn’t have to be painful or frightening.

“But please,” I’m saying, “I put my pain into it. Take my anguish. See my anguish. Please take it. Take it away from me.”

Jack: Is the white fog doing any of that already?

Nadyezhda: [sigh] It’s helping on a spiritual level but it’s not there yet.

Jack: OK. [pause]

Nadyezhda: Do you have a suggestion of what to do next? [Jack does not offer a suggestion.] [pause]

I’m going back into the cave. To see the people and that man.

Jack: Well, a number of things have happened. The baby that you were nourishing for example. The blue crystal sphere. Sometimes we’re given everything we need but we don’t recognize it.

Nadyezhda: Hmm.

Jack: But I think it’s good, as you’re doing, to return to the old man. And specifically ask him what you just asked. “How can my anguish be taken away?”

Nadyezhda: I’ll ask him. [sigh] [pause]

I’m listening for a signal. I’m too agitated, frustrated or something.

Jack: It’s hard to be clear when frustration enters. But just give it a bit more time. Because I think you need to come back to that spot that you had arrived at. You’re still in this very large cave. There are those people. There are torches on the wall.

Nadyezhda: I start screaming in the cave. Screaming to the walls. [pause]

Jack: Are there echoes of the scream?

Nadyezhda: Yes, it fills the whole cavern. [sigh] [pause]

I’m not sure. I’m sure it will go any further. There’s an agitation. There’s something I’m not able to see or confront.

Jack: You said at the beginning that there were “things” on the walls.

Nadyezhda: Yes, there were growths on the walls – like minerals. Stalactites.

Jack: Do you feel the man who was helping is still with you?

Nadyezhda: Here’s still there. A good presence.

Jack: Maybe he could make a suggestion. Because he’s not frustrated. He’s there to help.

Nadyezhda: He can take the boat to a different place. [sigh]

Maybe the group of people and the old man were not able to help me. I need help from a shaman. I should go to this shore where he’s having a fire and he’s chanting by the fire. [sigh] [pause]

He starts to speak to me in a tongue I don’t understand and he chants. [sigh] He’s chanting I think.

Jack: That’s part of his ceremony I suppose.

Nadyezhda: Yes.

Jack: What are you asking of him?

Nadyezhda: I’m asking him, “Resolve this cruel karma, this cruel fate. Allow me to be free and move without a constant affliction and the interference of sabotage. How can it be possible?” [sigh]

He starts to twirl and dance. The fire spits and hisses. The things that he’s wearing are shaking and making noises. He’s shaking his staff and stamping his feet on the ground. Moving and spinning and spinning.

He’s saying a prayer for me. Something to break the spell. Break the spell of the vicious cycle.

I feel my need and my desire to be without affliction. And I’m worried that it won’t help. I feel so constricted. [sigh] Break free. Break the bondage.

But he’s doing it. He’s spitting and turning, making noises and shaking his staff. He’s creating a fury. A tornado.

I ask him, “Take my wounds away. I’ve had enough. I’m beyond enough. Take away the deadness and resistance.” And he’s anything but deadness. He’s fury and spitting.

Jack: That’s right. [pause]

Nadyezhda: He can go like this for 12 hours. [sigh] I won’t be able to sleep for 12 hours. But I see on his skin that he has scars as well – marks, cuts, things that release the energy.

Feeling this, it’s so invigorating. I want to push my feet into the sand and grunt and growl and spit. Shudder the violence away. Push it all away into the act of spinning. See it disappear. [pause]

I still have my anger and frustration. [sigh] It’s strong.

Jack: Maybe we can speed up time and he can finish what he’s doing – even if it is 12 hours. But it will have some effect – what he’s doing. Something else may appear or maybe it’s just a demonstration of how to use the energy of frustration.

Nadyezhda: He’s drawing the affliction out from my soul and my body.

Jack: Good. Let him continue.

Nadyezhda: I guess I have to ask him if there’s anything else that needs to be addressed.

Jack: Yes, it’s always good to ask that.

Nadyezhda: The violet light comes back. [sigh] The violet is restoring.

Jack: And now that the violet is back, is there a deeper penetration of it through the body?

Nadyezhda: I hope so. I’m asking it to come in.

Jack: Good.

Yes, particularly in those places – the abdomen, the solar plexus and the face of course. [pause]

Nadyezhda: I’m again just asking for restoration.

Jack: Yes, as you said last time, “Restoring the template.” Having everything conform again to the template, the ideal. The image of the ideal form.

Nadyezhda: The natural. [sigh]

I ask for forgiveness as well. I’m sorry for what I’ve done. I’m sorry. I only want integration. Please don’t allow me to act in any way against my own integration. Unconsciously or consciously. Please forgive me.

And I ask for protection. [sigh] And it should be resolved quickly.

“Please allow it to be resolved as quickly as possible. Please allow me to identify and seek out anyone who can help me to ascend. Please don’t allow it to get any worse. Don’t allow this to be repeated. I want everything to return to wholeness and nature and light. Please don’t allow anyone who can take away my integrity to appear in my life. Don’t allow me to listen to anyone who can harm me.” I’m talking to Archangel Michael.

Jack: Yes, it’s good to keep his image. Keep his image in front of you.

Nadyezhda: “Please wash away the affliction, all the past, present and future affliction. Let me be free.”

“Break up this new scar tissue. Break it up and cause it to resolve. Heal the wounds and dissolve them. Communicate and touch and speak and sing. And to spread whatever light and whatever joy that I need to spread. Not to be confined to deadness and darkness.”

I see a little white pearl appear in my chin.

Jack: Ah.

Nadyezhda: A flaming white pearl. It’s beautiful. It will take the place of the wound.

Jack: Exactly.

Nadyezhda: This is good.

Jack: What a gift.

Nadyezhda: Wisdom. The wisdom of something that transmits, shines. It’s Archangel Michael.

Jack: It’s from him, this gift?

Nadyezhda: Yes.

Jack: I’m seeing it as almost luminescent, right?

Nadyezhda: Yes. It’s beautiful. [pause]

The pearl will take the place of the inflammation, the repeated injuries, the repeated psychic injuries, the molestation, the degradation. [pause]

[sigh] I feel some relief and some pervasiveness. And I hope that the white pearl will carry the healing light to wherever it is needed.

Jack: Yes, it will. But it would be helpful for you to return to that image as often as you can. It will help stimulate its work.

Nadyezhda: It’s a flaming pearl – like the Bodhisattva has. It’s very beautiful.

And I say, “Help me restore my faith. Show me that you are there and carrying me through the healing process because I need to be connected to you. I need this. I don’t want to be in the dark. I need the connection with the higher beings who are there for protection. I need to take the right path. Not to step into the shadows – not for curiosity, not to challenge myself. I need the evidence of the higher beings, higher levels of consciousness of my own healing capacities, of my own gifts. I need not to take any steps backwards. [pause]

I need healing. I need stability. I need my little flaming white pearl to illuminate the correct path for me. And I’m grateful. I’m also grateful for the images of the planet Earth I got to see before this happened. How beautiful it was. How I wanted to stay there and become part of it.

Jack: You’ve been given quite a lot of material just in this session.

Nadyezhda: [sigh] Ask if there’s any other message before we end.

Jack: It’s always good to ask for something we may have forgotten to ask. Sometimes there is and sometimes it just feels complete. But it’s always good to ask if there isn’t some other very practical thing that would be helpful to Nadyezhda at this especially difficult time.

Nadyezhda: I put my hands up asking if there is anything – perhaps a message – and Archangel Michael gives me a dagger.

Jack: Ah.

Nadyezhda: Which I can use to protect myself.

Jack: Yes, you can protect yourself. Just cut away anything that pulls you down or keeps you from restoring complete health. [pause]

Nadyezhda: I thank him.

[Jack draws the session to a close.]

Posts in this series: Repairing Time Lines, A Good Man, The Firebird.

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Caught in Tar

(Copyright © Jack Cain 2017, text and images)

Jack: So, I think we just need to go where we need to go. An intention was set at the beginning and that intention is very present right now. There’s already a direction. We need to see now where that will take us.

Zoe: I see myself as my friend saw me in his meditation. It is also a nightmare I had when I was seven or eight which has stayed with me. There’s a whole field of black sand. It looks almost like tar before you lay it out on the road and it’s moving sand that’s trying to swallow me.

I’m a white woman, blond hair and really, really white skin – almost luminous. I’m alone and I can’t get out of it.

Jack: Can you see it now?

Zoe: Yes. My legs are stuck

Jack: How far up the legs does it go?

Zoe: Up to right before it reaches my vagina. My butt is out but most of my thighs are in. And if I move I sink deeper.

Jack: All right. Well, I think the obvious thing is that you need to ask for help in this situation. But you need to ask while facing the situation.

Zoe: There’s no one around. There’s no one. And I’m looking far, far, far.

Jack: But what’s around is the tar.

Zoe: I can only look up to the sky.

Jack: What happens when you look down.

Zoe: If I look up to the sky I see the sun. And it’s trying to shine among those grey clouds.

Jack: Well, maybe you need to keep looking there.

Zoe: Oh. The sun is extending an arm and trying to melt some of the tar around me. It’s trying to pull me out.

Jack: Does the tar have anything to say?

Zoe: It’s trying to keep me stuck.

Jack: Maybe you need to ask it to speak to you.

Zoe: “What do you want from me?”

Jack: Exactly. What do you want?

Zoe: It says that it needs my energy, that it feeds on my darkness.

I don’t want to feed you. I don’t want to be there.

Jack: Maybe you need to address your darkness. Where is your darkness?

Zoe: It’s all through my organs. I have some in my brain, I have some in my lungs, I have some in my heart. I even have some in my stomach and digestive system.

Jack: Maybe you need to connect now to the arm that was reaching down to you. And to the sunlight. Can you ask that it begin to enter into you, into those areas that are dark? [pause]

Do you want the sun to enter into those areas? [pause]

Zoe: The sun is entering my body. The entire sun is engulfing itself in my body. [pause]

Jack: So you can feel the penetration into all those areas, right?

Zoe: I can, but it’s a battle internally.

Jack: Yes.

Zoe: You would think that bright yellow trumps black and for most of the body it does help. [pause]

It’s not the right battle. It shouldn’t be a battle. Instead of vanquishing the darkness, the darkness should become light. [pause]

Jack: And what is needed for that to happen? [pause]

Zoe: My higher self needs to merge with me.

Jack: Yes. You can call on the higher self to speak.

Zoe: She doesn’t want to stay. She says there’s still some darkness and she doesn’t like it.

Jack: Can she tell you what you need to do?

Zoe: She says I need to poop it.

Jack: OK. Good.

Zoe: She says I need to shed it through my skin. And I need to poop it. And maybe vomit it.

Jack: Good. Excellent. Yes, we forget that the skin is a major way of getting rid of crap. Can you visualize that happening? [pause]

Zoe: I think it’s good. I’m shinier than I ever have been, because now the sun is shining through my entire body.

There’s still darkness in my heart.

It’s gone everywhere else but there’s still some in my heart.

Jack: OK. Do you need to do something about that as well? Maybe you could ask the higher self if there’s something special that needs to be done in heart that’s different from those other places.

Zoe: She says, “You need to love yourself. Unconditionally. The way you love a baby that’s done something bad.”

Jack: [chuckles] Beautiful. Right.

Zoe: She says, “You are that baby. You don’t stop loving it because it has pooped and screamed your ears off. You still love it.” [pause]

Jack: So you need to connect with that in your heart.

Zoe: She says it’s going to take some time and that it’s an every day thing that needs to be practiced. But when you heal yourself, you heal others. [pause]

Jack: How’s the tar?

Zoe: There’s a circle where the sun melted it. I’m in the air, holding onto the arms of the sun. And at the same time I am sun.

I’m trying to put my hand in front of my heart to hide the darkness that’s in there and my higher self says, “There’s no point in hiding it.”

Jack: [17:30] [chuckles] That’s right.

Zoe: She says that the sun will enter as I learn to love myself.

Jack: Yes. And it’s a process.

Zoe: Yes it’s a process that needs to be applied every day, not just once a month or once in a full moon, or… [pause]

She says if I hide it, I won’t work on it. So it’s better to see what is, rather than putting makeup on it. She says that I should know that since I don’t like makeup. I like the truth as beautiful or as ugly as it happens to be. [pause]

Jack: Good. And do you need to do a cleanup job on the crap that may be lying around?

Zoe: The tar wants to grab me back but it can’t reach me. I don’t know what to do to shoo it away from me.

Jack: It’s not touching you anymore though is it?

Zoe: No, but it’s very close to my feet. I’m in the air holding onto the sun. And there was a hole in the tar that was empty and now it’s gathering itself back together and trying to reach me.

My higher self is saying that’s to show me that I’m always in danger.

Jack: Yes. You have to do the work that’s required – the process. [pause]

Zoe: My higher self told me as long as I have darkness in my heart, the darkness that’s out there will know it and will try to seep it’s way back in.

Jack: That makes sense, yes.

Maybe you could also ask the higher self if there’s any advice that we’ve forgotten to ask about or some point that Zoe really needs to know that will be helpful for her.

Zoe: She says, “Be kind and firm. Just because you’re kind doesn’t mean you’re wishy-washy. But don’t forget to be kind to yourself and to others.” [big sigh] [pause]

Jack: So it seems very complete to me but Zoe needs to feel what we need to do next. It’s very powerful what has just taken place.

Zoe: She says that I need to recognize that energy in others. And she says there’s a man out there who is shining just as bright as I am right now. And who’s aware of the world the way I am. But I can only see it when I’m it – which is why it’s important to radiate that sun all the time. [pause]

Jack: Is there any advice about that man?

Zoe: I’m just visualizing the two sunny bodies joining and the two hearts joining and all the darkness being expelled when the two hearts touch.

Jack: Beautiful.

Zoe: She says that the only reason that’s possible is because I’ve been doing the work of self love and that he has too – that we both know that we’re not waiting for one another to expel the darkness.

Jack: You both need to do the work. Is that what you’re saying?

Zoe: Yes. On our own. Which is why when we meet it will be possible to merge and still be our own person, still carry the sun. That’s another way that the sun shines on Earth through each individual who loves themselves and loves others. [pause]

I think that’s that for this.

Jack: Yes, I think it’s virtually complete. Just make sure there isn’t anything more the higher self needs to say. It has said quite a lot already.

Zoe: She says that I know all I need to know for now. And I need to stay in that vibration.

She says it’s kind of like those mills that run with water. If there’s no water the millstone will not turn – right? It won’t work. Well, it’s the same thing with that light and that love. There needs to be water at all times – there needs to be love and sun at all times regardless of the situation.

Jack: Absolutely.

Zoe: I think that’s that.

Jack: Yes, I think you could just… we could both… feel some gratitude for this higher self that has come forward and been able to speak to us and now needs to return to its proper place which is usually hidden but still very present. So, just feeling that take place now…

Zoe: I said thank you to the little girl who knows more than I ever will. She’s laughing and she says, “That’s the spirit!”

Jack: Beautiful. We’re really ending in the sunlight but still with work to do.

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The Crow and Cloé’s Mission

(La version originale en français se trouve dans l’article précédent.)

(Copyright © Jack Cain 2017, text and images)

Cloé’s session begins with me asking her to go to a beautiful place that is safe and then to tell me about it.

Cloé: It’s an island in a lake in the area where I grew up. There’s a sandy beach all around the island. It’s not a very big island. It feels really good when I’m lying down on the sand or walking on the beach. I feel safe there.

Jack: Just stay there for a bit. You are in the process of taking in influences or impressions of this place. It’s almost like a kind of food.

It is the subconscious part of your consciousness that has provided you with this place which is so comfortable and which feels so safe.

What emotion are you feeling there?

Cloé: It’s the void. It’s the feeling of belonging to the planet, to the Earth with just things of nature around me, except of course for the boat I used to come to the island. There’s a sense of security in the void, in the silence… It’s like when you dive into the lake and you listen to the silence that is there in the deep water. That makes me feel really safe. It’s a feeling of being nothing.

Jack: And when you say “void” I have the impression that it’s not a void that is really empty. Do you sense life in it?

Cloé: There is so much life that it becomes empty.

Jack: Ah, I see.

Cloé: It’s incredibly full.

Jack: That’s right.

Cloé: Full of something… It’s hard to explain.

Jack: Perhaps there’s no need to explain. Perhaps it’s just a question of staying there for a while.

Do you feel you are part of the silence?

Cloé: I feel that I am permitted to be part of the silence. I feel that I belong to the silence. It’s as if I am balanced.

Jack: It’s important to continue – to feel that you are there, that you are part of the silence, that you belong to the silence. For the moment, I don’t think you have to go anywhere else because you may be able to find something in the silence – something that appears or shows up for you. Because we are looking for just the right thing, the most important thing for Cloé today, the 25th of August 2017.

Cloé: There’s an image. I wasn’t thinking about it. A crow has shown up.

Jack: Yes. Perhaps the crow has something to tell you. Proceed gently.

Cloé: It’s as if the crow is trying to speak to me but I don’t understand what he’s saying.

Jack: All you have to do is ask your higher part, a higher consciousness that can understand the crow’s language. Gradually, without forcing anything, what he is saying will become clear.

Cloé: He tells me that I’m not alone. [sigh]

Jack: Perhaps he could explain that a little. What does that mean? Are there other beings there that are part of a team or what?

Cloé: It’s as if he’s telling me that I have a mission to carry out – an important mission. And I’m not alone in doing that. It’s as though those who sent me are protecting me.

Jack: Yes.

Cloé: I’m asking him what I’m supposed to do. He replies that I already know, that I don’t have to ask that question.

Jack: Can you say what it is that you already know?

Cloé: It’s as if I’m becoming aware that I know things that others don’t – a knowledge. I think that the first thing is that I need to become aware of that very deeply. Because for me it’s difficult to accept that others don’t have that knowledge. I tend to think everyone has it. But it’s as if I receive a message that it’s not true that everyone has that.

Jack: Yes,it’s very important to realize that.

Cloé: It’s as though there is someone inside me who doesn’t want to admit that I’m not like everybody else. You see? So, it’s with that aspect that is different from others that I have to fulfill my mission. It’s as though I have a gift that I must pass on to others.

I have a deep understanding about the things of life without ever having learned them. They are inside me. And I know that they have a taste, a taste that is very deep. When I feel that I know I’m not mistaken – I know it’s not my ego.

Jack: Not at all. Because you’re able to tell what is ego and what isn’t.

Cloé: Yes, I think so. The ego has no interest in all that. It’s like a transmission of deep knowledge that comes from very far away – an understanding.

It’s as though I need to help people move towards that. And what I have to understand first is that I must understand that people don’t understand.

Jack: Right. Totally. This understanding is not very common.

And perhaps you can ask about the stages, the steps to take in this mission of transmitting knowledge to others. What do you have to do?

Cloé: Yes, in what capacity am I to do that? Is it with the new profession that I am starting now?

Jack: Yes, you could ask that…

Cloé: He says yes but not only with that but with other things as well. I need to simply search for what is the simplest way, using what appears on my path.

With Samuel for example. Samuel is the Alzheimer patient that I am looking after. There’s something I can do there.

Jack: Can you say what that is?

Cloé: It’s not clear.

Jack: Perhaps the crow can explain clearly the way your relationship with Samuel will be a part of how you need to move forward…

Cloé: It’s like the heart of it. With Samuel I can be who I really am. I can be who I am really in relation to my mission. You see?

Jack: Yes.

Cloé: Because with Samuel, there is no judgment. He’s like an unbalanced animal that is completely open. With Samuel I can be true. There’s no need to play a role. Yes, that’s it. So, if I want to make contact with him, I only need to be true and automatically a door will open. And it’s the same thing with everyone else – I just have to be true.

Jack: So with Samuel you have a learning process, right? In order to prepare yourself to be yourself ideally with everyone.

Cloé: Yes.

It’s as though the interactions with Samuel – what he says – is like a caricature in the sense that it doesn’t make any sense. But often what people say is like that, right?

Jack: Exactly the same. [both of us laugh] Completely without content – just spoken words that look like they mean something but in fact they are devoid of meaning. However, it takes strength and a kind of stability to be able to be yourself with others. Are there other things that would help you find the strength to be yourself with others, with everyone?

Cloé: Yes, for sure. My mother. My mother couldn’t help me. I’ve never been close to my mother. And yet there is a closeness to her that is essential, hidden and very deep. But my relationship with her is superficial – on my side.

What the most difficult for me is to be myself with my mother because I always have to play the role of the daughter that she wants me to be. So if I could manage to be as true with my mother as I am with Samuel that could help a lot.

Jack: So you have two tools that you can use – Samuel and your mother. It’s very practical. Of course your relationship with your mother is more difficult because it’s encumbered with a history, with a life. Nevertheless…

Cloé: It’s the opposite of Samuel. With Samuel, he allows me to be who I am. He doesn’t know who I am. He doesn’t recognize me from one time to the next. So, I can just be completely who I am. Whereas with my mother it’s just the opposite – she reduces me to her picture of who I am. It’s like two opposite things – one empty and one full.

Jack: But perhaps you need to recognize that your mother needs this change too. There is a possibility that this is going to help her as well.

You can ask that if you like. Perhaps it’s not necessary – I don’t know.

Cloé: The crow says that my mother needs me.

Jack: Ah.

Cloé: And vice versa. [pause]

He wants to leave.

Jack: The crow wants to leave?

Cloé: Yes, yes.

Jack: Before he goes it would be good to thank him.

Cloé: But I don’t want him to go right away. I see that there may be other things he will be able to tell me before leaving.

Jack: I would like him to tell you something about your sleep. [Before the session began Cloé was wondering why she needed so much sleep (9 or 10 hours), and why her sleep was so deep.]

Cloé: He says I go back to my island. My island is for sleeping.

Jack: So it’s because you need it then…

Cloé: Yes, I need it because it’s difficult. My mission is difficult. I have to balance. I need to rest because I have a big job to do.

Jack: Perhaps you can ask if you can be in touch with the crow again if you need to.

Cloé: He’s going to always be there for me.

I also ask him… I feel my father. He puts me in touch with my father.

Could it be that the crow is my father?

I’m trying to make the connection. I don’t know why my father is appearing very, very strongly.

Jack: It’s because he’s really there. He’s in front of you now. That’s what is there.

Cloé: Yes, but… I don’t understand what the connection is between the crow and my father.

Jack: But perhaps it’s possible that there is no connection. The crow has just put you in touch with him. If your father is there now there must be a reason for that. You can have some communication with him.

Cloé: Is it possible that the transmission of my mission comes from my father? At the level of my genes, at the level of who I am? In this incarnation? Do our parents transmit something? A kind of deep knowledge? Or does that have nothing to do with genetics? This is a question I am asking.

I’m being told I don’t need to know that, but still I want an answer.

Jack: [chuckling] I think it’s the associative mind that wants to know.

Cloé: Yes.

Jack: That part of the mind wants to rationally analyze the whole story. But what’s important is what is in front of you now. Your father is there. It’s true that we’ve just been talking about your mission for some time. We don’t know if there’s a connection between your father and your mission. But certainly your father is an important person in your life. So you can hold that question inside you. You can ask why he is there.

Cloé: But I just asked a little while ago and the same answer comes back. It’s as if the crow replies, “I am your father.”

Jack: OK.

Cloé: A part of me wants to understand that. I’m back in the same place I was a little while ago.

Jack: No, you’re not in the same place as you were a little while ago. And there’s a part of you that knows very well how to distinguish that you’re not in the same place in this moment that you were a few moments ago with the crow.

When the crow says, “I am your father.” that doesn’t necessarily mean that he is the same person as the person who was your father in this incarnation. He is perhaps your father in the sense that he is helping you understand.

Cloé: Right.

Jack: So you are beginning to understand how your vehicle operates – the possibility of thinking, the possibility of knowing. There are things that you already know completely. You know that you have a mission.

Cloé: Yes.

Jack: That’s not something you have to calculate or figure out – you know it quite clearly.

Cloé: Yes, it’s more than just having information. I am beginning to understand that I have knowledge that not everyone has. And that because of this knowledge I have a mission. It’s not something to keep for myself.

Jack: No. Absolutely not.

Cloé: So my mission is to share it. But I can’t give what has been transmitted to me just like that. I can’t explain it to anyone. So I have to find a round about way to help people.

Jack: Yes. Indirectly.

Cloé: Yes, very indirectly.

Jack: But each time you are beside another person, there is an influence that is passed. Both ways. No matter who it is. There is an influence that is passed in both directions. Of course there are people with whom you shouldn’t spend very much time because they are violent or there’s some other thing to avoid. However, when you’re with someone you can feel whether or not there’s something open in that person.

Cloé: Yes.

Jack: And in that moment you can simply transmit – without saying anything.

Cloé: Yes, as I do with children. I work with children too you know.

Jack: Yes, that’s it. Exactly. It’s not that you conduct a communication, it’s that a communication takes place…

Cloé: Yes.

Jack: …because of who you are

Cloé: And then too, the more I go inside myself into the void, into a peacefulness, on my island, the more the communication is going to take place naturally.

Jack: Yes, naturally.

Cloé: OK.

Jack: It’s not a question of language, it’s not a question of words, it’s just a question of who you are.

Cloé: Right.

Jack: When a person learns how to be who they are, then there is an influence that extends out from that person. A constant communication. Not just with other people but also with plants, with the Earth… It’s a whole network of all these connections.

Cloé: So the whole environment, everything I touch deeply.

Jack: But it’s not that you touch it, it’s that you emanate. It has to do with your emanation. Because you are a being of light, you emanate constantly. But that’s putting something into words. Sometimes, it’s not good to put things into words because there’s a distortion.

Cloé: Yes. That happens in the silence. It’s like trying to explain the silence with words.

Jack: Yes, it’s not something that can be explained. It’s a very special state – being in the silence. And that’s where you began the session. And you know very well that it’s there in the void, in the silence, that you are truly alive.

Cloé: The crow has just left… in the same way that he arrived – making his crow sound.

[big sigh]

I get back in my boat. I’m leaving my island and I say thanks to it. I thank the crow too.

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Le Corbeau et la mission de Cloé

(In the next post you will find an English translation of this session.)

(Copyright © Jack Cain 2017, text and images)

La session avec Cloé commence avec une demande de ma part qu’elle aille a un lieu sécurisé et beau et puis de le décrire pour moi :

Cloé: C’est une île sur le lac où est-ce que j’ai grandie. Tout autour de l’île, il y a une plage de sable. Ce n’est pas une très grande île. Mais sur la plage je me sens vraiment bien couchée dans le sable, ou marcher dans le sable. Je sens la sécurité là.

Jack: Juste reste là pour un temps. Tu es en train d’absorber les influences, les impressions de ce lieu presque comme si c’était une nourriture.

La partie subconsciente de ta conscience t’a donné ce lieu qui est tellement confortable et bien en toute sécurité.

C’est quoi l’émotion qui est là pour toi dans cet endroit?

Cloé: C’est le vide. C’est le sentiment d’appartenir à la planète, à la Terre avec juste les choses de la nature autour de moi, à part le bateau dans lequel je me suis servi pour me rendre sur l’île évidemment. Mais, c’est la sécurité du vide, le silence… C’est comme quand on plonge dans le lac le silence qu’on entend quand on est dans le fond de l’eau. C’est très sécurisant pour moi. C’est le sentiment d’être rien.

Jack: Et quand tu dis « vide » j’ai l’impression que ce n’est pas un vide qui est vraiment vide. Est-ce que tu sens une vie dedans?

Cloé: Il y a tellement de vie que ça devient vide.

Jack: Ah ha.

Cloé: C’est extrêmement plein.

Jack: Oui, c’est ça.

Cloé: Mais plein de quelque chose… C’est dur à expliquer.

Jack: Peut-être ce n’est pas nécessaire d’expliquer. Peut-être c’est juste une question de rester là encore un bout de temps.

Est-ce que tu sens que tu fais partie du silence?

Cloé: Je sens que j’ai la permission de faire partie du silence. Puis je sens que j’appartiens au silence. C’est comme je suis en harmonie.

Jack: C’est important de continuer comme ça – de sentir que tu es là, que tu fais partie du silence, que tu appartiens au silence. Pour le moment, je ne crois pas qu’il soit nécessaire d’aller quelque part d’autre parce que il y a une possibilité que tu puisses trouver quelque chose dans le silence – quelque chose qui surgit ou qui se manifeste pour toi. Parce que nous sommes à la recherche de ce que c’est exactement la chose la plus importante pour Cloé aujourd’hui le 25 du mois d’août, 2017. Juste reste là et peut-être tu puisses voir s’il y a quelque chose qui arrive, la prochaine chose importante. [pause]

Cloé: C’est une image. Je n’ai pas réfléchi. J’ai vu un corbeau arriver.

Jack: Oui. Peut-être le corbeau a quelque chose à te communiquer. Il faut aller doucement.

Cloé: C’est comme si le corbeau essayait de me parler mais je ne comprends pas qu’est-ce qu’il dit.

Jack: Oui, mais il faut tout simplement demander à ta partie supérieur, une conscience supérieur qui pourrait comprendre le langage du corbeau. Et graduellement, sans pousser, ce qu’il te dit va devenir clair.

Cloé: Il m’a dit que je ne suis pas toute seule. [soupir]

Jack: Peut-être il peut expliquer ça un peu plus. Qu’est-ce que ça veut dire? Est-ce qu’il y a d’autres êtres là qui font partie d’une équipe ou quoi?

Cloé: C’est comme s’il disait que j’avais une mission à remplir – une mission importante. Je ne suis pas toute seule là-dedans. C’est comme si ceux qui m’ont envoyé en mission me protègent.

Jack: Oui.

Cloé: Je lui demande qu’est-ce que je dois faire. Il répond que je le sais déjà, que je n’ai pas à poser la question.

Jack: Est-ce que tu peux dire c’est quoi que tu sais déjà?

Cloé: C’est comme si je prends conscience que j’ai une connaissance que les autres n’ont pas. Puis, je crois qu’il faut que premièrement que j’en prenne conscience profondément. Parce que pour moi c’est difficile à comprendre que les autres ne l’ont pas. Moi, je pense que tout le monde a cela. Mais c’est comme si je reçois un message que ce n’est pas vrai que c’est tout le monde a cela.

Jack: C’est très important de constater cela.

Cloé: C’est comme si en dedans de moi il y avait une personne qui ne veut pas l’avouer que je ne suis pas comme tout le monde. Tu vois? Donc, c’est avec cet aspect-là qui est différent des autres que je dois remplir ma mission. C’est comme si j’avais un don que je dois redonner aux autres.

Je comprends des choses de la vie profondément sans les avoir apprises. Ils sont à l’intérieur de moi. Puis je sais que ça avait une saveur, une saveur de vérité profonde. Quand je ressens ça je sais que je ne me trompe pas, que ce n’est pas mon égo.

Jack: Pas du tout. Alors, tu es capable de distinguer ce que c’est l’égo et ce qui ne l’est pas.

Cloé: Oui. Je crois que oui. Il n’y a pas d’intérêt pour l’égo là-dedans. C’est comme une transmission de connaissances profondes qui vient de loin – de compréhension.

C’est comme c’est qu’il fallait que j’aide les gens de s’en aller vers cela. Puis qu’est-ce qu’il faut que j’apprenne en premier c’est de comprendre que les gens ne comprennent pas.

Jack: Oui, absolument, cette compréhension n’est pas très commune.

Et peut-être tu peux demander quels sont les étapes, les pas à prendre dans cette mission de transmettre ces connaissances à d’autres personnes. Qu’est-ce que tu dois faire?

Cloé: Oui, par quel billet je peux faire ça. Est-ce que c’est avec la profession nouvelle que je commence actuellement?

Jack: Oui, tu peux demander ça…

Cloé: Il dit oui mais pas seulement avec ça mais avec d’autres choses aussi. Il faut que je cherche dans la simplicité, ce qui est plus simple, ce qui se présente sur mon chemin.

Avec Samuel par exemple. Samuel c’est le patient Alzheimer à qui je donne soins. Il y a quelque chose à faire là.

Jack: Est-ce que tu peux préciser ce que c’est?

Cloé: Ce n’est pas clair.

Jack: Peut-être le corbeau peut expliquer plus clairement de quelle façon ta relation avec Samuel va être une partie de ton cheminement…

Cloé: C’est comme l’essence. Avec Samuel je peux être dans qui je suis réellement – dans qui je suis réellement par rapport à ma mission. OK?

Jack: Oui.

Cloé: Parce qu’avec Samuel il n’a aucun jugement. Il est juste comme un animal déstabilisé avec une ouverture. Avec Samuel je peux être vrai, je n’ai pas besoin de jouer un rôle. Ah, voilà. Donc, si je veux entrer en contact, j’ai juste à être vrai et automatiquement il y a une porte qui va s’ouvrir. Donc, c’est la même chose avec tout le monde – j’ai juste à être vrai.

Jack: Alors, avec lui tu as une apprentissage quoi – pour te préparer pour être tout à fait toi-même idéalement avec tout le monde.

Cloé: Oui.

C’est comme si les interactions d’Samuel – ce qu’il dit – c’est tellement une caricature dans le sens que ça ne fait aucun sens. Mais souvent ce que les gens disent aussi c’est la même chose, eh?

Jack: Exactement la même chose. [rires] Tout à fait, sans aucun contenu – juste des mots parlés qui ont l’air d’avoir une signification mais vraiment qui sont vides de signification. Mais ça prend une force, ça prend une stabilité en toi d’être capable d’être toi-même envers les autres. Est-ce qu’il y a d’autres choses qui pourraient t’aider à trouver la force pour être toi-même dans le monde avec n’importe qui?

Cloé: Oui, surement. Ma mère. Ma mère n’a pu m’aider. Je n’ai jamais eu une relation vraiment proche avec ma mère. Mais ma proximité avec ma mère est dans l’essence, cachée et très profonde. Mais notre relation est superficielle – pour moi.

La chose la plus difficile pour moi, c’est d’être moi-même avec ma mère, parce que j’ai toujours le rôle de la fille qu’elle voulait que je sois. Donc, si je réussi d’être vrai avec ma mère comme je le suis avec Samuel, ça pourrait m’aider beaucoup.

Jack: Alors, ce sont deux outils que tu peux utiliser – Samuel et ta mère. C’est très pratique. Bien sûr la relation avec ta mère est plus difficile parce que c’est encombrée avec une histoire, puis une vie. Mais quand même…

Cloé: Parce que c’est l’opposé d’Samuel. Samuel, il me permet d’être qui je suis. Il ne sais pas qui je suis, il ne me connaît pas d’une fois à l’autre. Donc, j’ai toute la possibilité d’être qui je suis. Tandis que ma mère c’est complètement l’inverse, elle me réduit à sa vision qu’elle a de moi. C’est comme deux opposés – un vide et un plein.

Jack: Mais, peut-être il faut reconnaître que ta mère a besoin de ce changement aussi – ce changement dans ton comportement je veux dire. Il y a une possibilité que ça va lui aider également.

Mais tu peux demander ça si tu veux. Peut-être ce n’est pas nécessaire, je ne sais pas.

Cloé: Le corbeau dit que ma mère a besoin de moi.

Jack: Ah.

Cloé: Et vice versa. [pause]

Il veut s’en aller.

Jack: Le corbeau veut s’en aller?

Cloé: Oui, oui.

Jack: Avant qu’il s’en aille, il serait bien de le remercier.

Cloé: Mais moi je ne veux pas qu’il s’en aille tout-de-suite. Je vois s’il n’y a pas d’autres choses qu’il pourra me dire avant de partir.

Jack: J’aimerais qu’il te dise quelque chose à propos de ton sommeil. [Cloé se demande avant la session pourquoi elle a besoin de tant de sommeil (9 ou 10 heures), et pourquoi ce sommeil soit si profond.]

Cloé: Il dit c’est mon retour sur l’île. C’est mon île de sommeil.

Jack: C’est parce que tu en as besoin alors…

Cloé: Oui, j’en ai besoin parce que c’est difficile. Ma mission est difficile. Il faut que j’équilibre. J’ai besoin de repos parce que j’ai un gros travail à faire.

Jack: Peut-être tu peux demander si tu peux re-contacter le corbeau si tu en as besoin.

Cloé: Il va toujours être là pour moi.

Je lui demande aussi… Je sens mon père. Il me met en contact avec mon père.

Est-ce que ça se peut que c’est mon père le corbeau ?

J’essaie de faire le lien. Je ne sais pas pourquoi mon père paraît fort, fort, fort.

Jack: Mais, c’est ce qu’il est vrai. Il est devant toi maintenant. C’est ça qui est là.

Cloé: Oui, mais… Je ne comprends pas c’est quoi le lien avec le corbeau puis mon père.

Jack: Mais peut-être c’est possible qu’il n’y a pas un lien. Le corbeau t’a mis en contact avec lui. Si ton père est là maintenant il y a une raison pour ça. Tu peux avoir une communication avec lui.

Cloé: Est-ce que ça se peut que la transmission de ma mission vient de mon père ? Au niveau de mes gènes, au niveau de qui je suis ? Au niveau de mon âme ? De mon incarnation ? Est-ce que c’est quelque chose qui se transmet avec les parents ? Une espèce de connaissance profonde ? Ou ça n’a pas de rapport avec le génétique ? C’est une question que je pose.

Bon, on me répond que je n’ai pas besoin de savoir ça, mais quand même je veux avoir une réponse.

Jack: [petits rires] Je crois que c’est la partie mentale qui veut savoir.

Cloé: Oui.

Jack: La partie mentale veut utiliser la raison pour déchiffrer toute l’histoire. Mais l’important c’est ce qui est là devant toi maintenant. Alors ton père est là. On vient de parler assez longuement à propos de ta mission, oui, c’est vrai. On ne sait pas ce que c’est la relation entre ton père et ta mission. Mais bien sûr ton père est une personne importante dans ta vie. Alors tu peux garder la question en toi. Tu peux lui demander pourquoi il est là.

Cloé: Mais je l’ai demandé tantôt puis c’est encore la même réponse qui revient. C’est comme si le corbeau répond, « Je suis ton père ».

Jack: Bon.

Cloé: Une partie de moi veut comprendre ça. Je retombe dans la même place que tantôt.

Jack: Non, tu n’es pas dans la même place que tantôt. Et il y a une partie de toi qui sait très bien distinguer que tu n’es pas dans la même place dans ce moment que tu l’étais il y a quelques minutes avec le corbeau.

Quand le corbeau dit, « Je suis ton père » ça ne veut pas dire nécessairement qu’il est la même personne que la personne qui a été ton père dans cette incarnation. Il est peut-être ton père dans le sens de t’aider à comprendre.

Cloé: Oui, Oui.

Jack: Alors, tu commences à voir maintenant le fonctionnement de ton véhicule – la possibilité de penser, la possibilité de savoir. Mais il y a des choses que tu sais déjà complètement. Tu sais que tu as une mission.

Cloé: Oui.

Jack: Ce n’est pas quelque chose à calculer ou déchiffrer – tu le sais tout clairement.

Cloé: Oui, c’est plus que j’ai des informations, j’ai des connaissances que je commence à comprendre que ce n’est pas tout le monde qui les a. Donc, par le fait de ces connaissances-là, j’ai une mission. Je ne peux garder ça pour moi.

Jack: Non. Absolument pas.

Cloé: Donc ma mission c’est de la partager. Mais je ne peux pas la donner juste comme ça ce qui m’est transmit. Je ne peux pas l’expliquer à personne. Donc, il faut juste que je trouve une façon détournée d’aider des gens.

Jack: Oui. Indirectement.

Cloé: Oui, très indirecte.

Jack: Mais chaque fois que tu es à côté d’une autre personne, il y a une influence qui passe. De chaque côté. Avec n’importe qui. Il y a une influence qui passe dans les deux directions. Bien sûr il y a des personnes avec qui tu ne devrais pas passer beaucoup de temps parce qu’il sont violentes, ou quelque chose d’autre à éviter. Mais quand tu es avec une personne tu peux sentir également s’il y a quelque chose là qui est ouvert.

Cloé: Oui.

Jack: Et en ce moment tu peux simplement transmettre – sans rien dire.

Cloé: Oui, comme je l’ai fait avec les enfants. Je travaille avec les enfants aussi là.

Jack: Oui, oui. Exact. Ce n’est pas que tu fais une communication c’est qu’une communication se fait…

Cloé: Oui.

Jack: …à cause de ce que tu es.

Cloé: Puis, plus je vais à l’intérieur de moi dans le vide, dans la paix, sur mon île, plus la communication va se faire naturellement.

Jack: Oui, naturellement.

Cloé: OK.

Jack: Ce n’est pas une question de langage, ce n’est pas une question de mots, c’est juste une question d’être qui tu es.

Cloé: Oui, oui.

Jack: Mais quand une personne apprend à être ce qu’elle est, là, il y a une influence qui sort de cette personne. Il y a une communication constante. Pas juste à d’autres personnes aussi mais à des plantes, à la Terre… C’est tout un réseau avec toutes ces connections.

Cloé: Alors, tout l’entourage, tout ce que je touche dans le fond.

Jack: Mais, ce n’est pas que tu touches mais tu émanes. C’est une émanation qui est là. Parce que tu es un être de lumière il y a une émanation constante. Mais, ça c’est mettre quelque chose en mots. Des fois, ce n’est pas bon peut-être de mettre trop de chose en mots parce qu’il y a une distorsion.

Cloé: Oui. Ça se fait par le silence. C’est comme expliquer le silence avec des mots.

Jack: Oui, ça ne s’explique pas. C’est un état très spécial – être dans le silence. Et c’est là que tu as commencé la session. Et tu sais bien que c’est être là dans le vide, dans le silence, c’est là où tu vis vraiment.

Cloé: Le corbeau vient de partir… comme il est arrivé avec un son, le son de corbeau.

[grand soupir]

Je reprends mon bateau, je vais quitter mon île en lui disant merci. Je remercie le corbeau aussi.

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Rebuilding Light Structures

(Copyright © Jack Cain 2017, text and images)

 Sergei: I’m at the edge of a big hole that opens into the earth. Now this hole is gianormous. Ha, ha. This is like whoa! But I feel safe at the edge of this cliff. I’m more like a touristy viewer at the moment. It’s unusual because I know that normally I’d be scared or there would be that feeling that you have around the edges of cliffs or tall structure buildings when you look over the edge but… Yeah, it seems like this is the kind of place I need to be at right now and just being there seems already to be recharging me in some way and we’re observing that.

It’s a circular hole into the Earth – I think. I’m not sure.

Jack: So it’s something you really can’t see the bottom of I guess?

Sergei: Yes.

Jack: And is it dark in there?

Sergei: Yeah, it’s fairly dark although… ah… it can be illuminated… ah… [chuckle] with my mind and imagination even but… It’s not a scary place. It’s just the vastness of it. There’s like an echo without sound so like it’s alive in some way and…

It seems to be a place to connect with, explore…

Jack: Yes.

Sergei: Perhaps not even physically necessarily. I might need some guidance into that.

Jack: There’s something wonderful about beginning with a place like this – it’s full of possibilities because it’s not defined yet and you are on the edge. I think it’s really important not to go too quickly and to just be there on the edge of it. Appreciate the vastness of it so that you begin to feel that something is taking place inside you just because you are there beside it.

There is, as you say, a soundless echo. There is a reverberation between you and that place. So by just staying there for a bit something begins to vibrate inside you and perhaps correspondingly a resonance is there in that vastness. And, out of that, something can begin to appear or it may be that you need to do something. Take an action or…

It is good to be close to the body – the physical body – and its breathing while at the same time you’re in that location. We need to simply ask your subconscious to be the director here.

Sergei: Yeah, well, it appears that I’m at what I would call the bottom [chuckling] of this bottomless pit and somehow there’s a light on me.

[laughing] I just find it funny.

Jack: You’re in the spotlight.

Sergei: Well, as we can see, I don’t seem to have an issue with that.

I appear to be observing myself and coming closer to myself.

I’m ah light. And I’m watching myself appear at the bottom of this pit or somewhere along the line of travel into this place. And I’m very bright. I still have human-like contours, it seems… but they might be disappearing. I’m just observing. So I was at the top. Now I’m somewhere standing on some surface.

It’s just changed in that I appear to be entering into, wandering into a…

Jack: Yes, that seems good. That seems like what needs to happen.

Sergei: I’m looking around. There is a direction. It looks like going into a throat because it’s cave-like… but there’s a sense of verticality here too.

Now, yeah, I’m looking to the left. I sense myself changing direction. Looking strongly. There’s a current, a flow.

Jack: Ah, a current. Yes.

Sergei: Yeah. It’s presented here in the sense of again being in a deep place and [sigh] the soundless sounds…

It’s almost like the flow of air in such a place is the energetic appreciation of the structure.

Anyway, I need a moment to let that be.

Jack: Yes. I don’t want us to go too quickly. You just need to take the time it takes. There’s nothing wrong with some moments of silence in the middle of this because you need to really sense where you’re going and what’s taking place.

Sergei: Yup.

Jack: And then you can just speak when there’s something to speak about. The real concentration needs to be on your participation in what’s taking place. You need to be as aware as possible. [pause]

Sergei: Well, there’s that journeying duality. There’s a bounding back and forth between this and that.

Jack: Yes, it requires a certain discipline to make sure you don’t just bounce straight back into the ordinary mind and start commenting on it all. There has to be a focus on the journey. Because you’re going somewhere.

Sergei: All right.

Jack: And it’s a natural process for the mind to jump back and forth like that. It’s just how we’re built. [pause]

Sergei: [sigh]

Jack: And it’s very simple in a way because we just need to move on to whatever the next important thing in the journey is. But you need to feel comfortable with that too. It’s ok to stop for a while in different places. [pause]

Sergei: Yeah, I’m not afraid of the dark. I’m being shown places that are… hmm… I think there are things there but there aren’t.

[chuckle] I just mean it is correct not to be afraid of the dark… in all those ways [sigh] that I have been.

Jack: Yes. That’s right.

Sergei: In a way, there’s nothing there although it is alive and it is communicating right now.

Jack: Yes. So it’s the communication that’s important of course. And there may be a form that appears and there may not. But you can feel the presence.

Sergei: Yeah. So within the richness of that… [pause]

Interesting. It’s like something is breathing through me. Even through my throat, almost as a secondary breath. And through my system.

Jack: Yes, that’s usually a sign of a transition taking place. And it’s good to stay very close to the breath. Because it is a different breath. It is a different breathing really. As you enter into this. [pause]

Sergei: Yeah, I might be de-materializing or re-integrating into the matter that I’m breathing with.

Jack: Yes. Yes. And usually this is necessary for you to move further in this new environment. It requires a change of state. So it’s just happening very naturally. You’re built to be able to do this. But it is using capacities that are not used very often. [pause]

Sergei: [big breath in] OK. Now I’m a part of the whole. I’m what allows it to have the passage of… I allow it to be a passage. And by that I can therefore… It is possible to be… anywhere with it. There are still some moments to go.

Jack: Yes, take your time. [pause]

Sergei: [voice now much quieter] It seems I need to be more gentle. Just re-calibrating. [pause]

Maybe I’ll speak in keywords. There’s pulsation that… pulsation… allowing… connection… there’s a focusing… crystal – yeah… crystal building… Before building a crystal it can be mind mapped. [pause] All right… The architecture of it. Ah.

In this place of new sensitivities we work together to…

[chuckle] It’s almost like working with our eyes to draw lines in space which form the crystals. [chuckle] [pause] [laughing]

Just coming close to myself looking at what appears to be working in the dark and the eyes having [bursting into laughter] laser beams. It’s not funny. I’m laughing but it’s just a feel-good thing and there’s an exploration into re-discovering that.

Jack: Yeah, well, the vision is working differently. It’s a different apparatus and a different situation.

Sergei: [sigh] So the mission is on focusing. [sigh]

We’re rebuilding the light structures, the light infrastructures. That is the way that it can be presented in words. It’s on a different plane of matter but, in order to focus, Sergei needs to have this work correspondingly done within himself which has to do with the physics of light in structures that allow for light manipulation such as cameras, microscopes, telescopes. In a similar way the plane on which this work is done has light work inside a human being… [pause]

Right. There are surfaces in various planes which, in order to have a connective property, such as the flow of soundless sound through the deep structure… In other words, in order for Sergei to thrive with the sensitivities, the light infrastructures are now being worked on. This is something he does on another plane as well. Kind of like a work in which one can specialize, and sometimes one forgets to do that work for oneself. [pause]

Jack: Do you have any sense of where this work is being directed from?

Sergei: It appeared to be a tunnel at first with a light at the end. But now it appears to be actually a planet of sorts illuminated like a moon. It’s correct to say that it’s just a node. In other words there’s a vast expanse of co-direction from the Source.

Jack: OK. Good. I felt it was important to check that. It sounds perfect.

Sergei: Now there is a brief image of what appears to be an old friend from space with the horns – a kind of royal figure I’ve met before.

Jack: In this circumstance there may be some communication that can take place. [long pause]

Sergei: I’m there resting now in this white palace with a friend for a moment.

Jack: That’s fine.

Sergei: It seems I may have been away for a while. But it’s a common place.

Jack: Common? In what sense? You’ve been there before? Is that what you mean?

Sergei: Yeah, I’m not even interested in the palace. It’s more like gladness to have a moment with a friend who seems to be the main inhabitant. He’s very tall. [pause]

Yeah, it’s in the clouds. [pause]

I had turned around to see the view. That is why I know we are in the clouds. And there is beautiful greenery, countryside. Perhaps a few miles up. No a little bit less. Sunny day. [sigh]

Jack: Nice.

Sergei: We’re at tea, discussing something. Not really drinking tea. It just feels like teatime.

Jack: Yeah. Teatime in the sense of a pleasant exchange. [pause]

Sergei: There was an exchange about bones and who’s passing on. In the sense of [pause] just the observation [sigh] of that transition. [pause]

Who’s working on what.

Now it’s as if we are watching or focused on some unknown entity. Dark… Dark… a black figure – not by skin but… a black figure. It’s almost as if we’re watching the equivalent of a transmission of the whereabouts and we’re just observing. [pause]

I seem to be learning about a particular type of being – learning to identify them for what they are. That’s all. It’s like a kind of help that I’ve come here for.

Jack: It’s reminding me of a quotation I have from the Nag Hammadi texts that I have placed in front of me at my desk: “Recognize what is in your sight and that which is hidden from you will become plain to you.”


Sergei: Yeah. Yes. There’s more to that. It depends on the meaning of re-cognize. [sigh] Because there’s a sense of purity in cognition itself which can be instantaneous. [pause]

Jack: Is the dark figure still there or have you moved on to something else?

Sergei: In that vision we were observing a demonstration of its being-ness and then it flew off.

And now we’re exchanging on the fact that this personal transparency is concurrent with being able to simply observe that which can be recognized. And this is done within the physical body that one has here on Earth as a human. There is a breathing, a breathing through it. [pause]

One can generate one’s own heat. [pause]

  1. I thank him.

Jack: Your tall friend there, you mean?

Sergei: Yeah.

Wow. It feels like in order to go back, I, the body needed to get really heavy.

Jack: Yes. That’s usually what happens in this transition period. Yes, the body re-asserts itself after about this amount of time. It’s not possible to be out of it for too long. It has its needs and it is our current condition of being incarnated so… I think that has to be respected. So… just watch what’s happening. [pause]

Sergei: There’s now a possibility to go deeper.

Jack: Good. [pause]

Sergei: I might be able to view some information from the past – with guidance. There appears to be a spillage of ink. [whispered]

Jack: Yes, if it’s important to see something from the past right now then it’s just a matter of focus.

Sergei: There appears to be a female friend with curvy outlines which I’m looking at. Possibly she might be lying on the bed in front of me but it’s dark. It’s more of the appreciation. Oh. It seems to be a past partner perhaps.

Jack: Does something need to be communicated between you? I mean something already is – but something more?

Sergei: How does one say one is sorry?

Jack: I think you just need to feel it rather than say it. It will be communicated. [pause] [tears?]

Sergei: Yeah. I feel it. It’s felt. I don’t know… [sigh] Right. It seems in the awakened sensitivity it’s possible for me to cry right now and really feel that I may have hurt someone or that there’s some… or that there’s some… Right. A kind of blockage due to un-resolved-ness. But… [sigh] I’m to remain with the feeling.

Jack: Yes, I think it’s important to remain with the feeling because it is releasing something. The blockage would be due to an unreleased feeling.

There’s an expression of it in your body and in your breathing probably. So… there can be a release there. As long as you’re not beating yourself up about it.

Sergei: Yeah.

Jack: But it’s good to have that movement in the emotional center. It frees up some space. Clears away certain things. Which was one of your goals for the session. [pause]

So what’s the next thing we need to move towards? Is there another goal? Or is there something neither of us have thought about that needs to be brought into focus? [long pause]

Sergei: Just a bit more time.

Jack: That’s fine. [long pause]


[Note: Here the dialogue switches. It is now the Higher Self speaking through Sergei about Sergei.]


Sergei: Yes. There’s something about how Sergei can expand his behindness with the field behind himself in the same sense as when one says, “Put your back into it.” There is a sense of forwardlookingness when one can look around oneself as if having a sense which can be used to feel all around oneself including behind oneself.

Jack: Right.

Sergei: The strength in the back isn’t only physical. Sergei tends to place himself in wonderfully difficult places because he’s able to do that with another body and another place where there isn’t physicality. But placing oneself under a huge wave is not the same on this plane as it can be somewhere else. Here, there’s a responsibility for the physicality of it. You will have the wave crush you if you’re under the wave with your physical body. Bringing your back into it can be a helpful reminder.

Stop observing and jump in. [chuckle]

Jack: Well. That is what you did in this session. It is about learning how to do that. Instead of holding back. Don’t hold back. Just put you back into it. [pause]

Sergei: Yeah. It’s important for Sergei to maintain what he knows is himself. There are many around him who currently do not resonate in the same way. They are just on a different part of the path.

Jack: Yes. But perhaps he needs to have one or two people who do resonate this way. It is important to find and foster that.

Sergei: That can be found within the work.

Jack: Do you mean the Gurdjieff work or just work in general?

Sergei: Both in life and that which is taught in the Gurdjieff work. But it’s meant to be played out in daily life.

Jack: Yes. Absolutely.

Sergei: So… It is true that the work resonates in both. But there’s more of an affinity for Sergei to find that outside of the Gurdjieff work while having it within as well. But the answer to the question is outside.

Jack: In life. It’s in life but there’s stuff taking place inside you at the same time of course. There’s a correspondence. [pause]

Sergei: There are some questions being answered. [pause]

For Sergei there’s a great difficulty in working on things, on questions by oneself. In his case he benefits by sharing the work. But that is a benefit for all; because he shares this as well.

Just a moment. [pause]


[Note: Here the dialogue switches again. Now it is no longer the Higher Self speaking through Sergei about Sergei but rather some group intelligence using the pronoun “we” asking Jack to take some specific action for Sergei’s benefit.]


Jack, we need you to guide him through something that would be beneficial from that side so he knows that it’s in the moments where he’s still that he can find his friends. But perhaps from your experience you might know what that means. He’s able to at least enter and invite and meet the affinite ones but there’s a tendency to lose the connection whether now or in the future. That’s his line of work to maintain the connection by seeing how alive the body can be – the physical body.

Jack: Right. [pause]

Yes, it was said somewhere recently that the physical body is not important per se but what you do with it is important.

So I think there’s a sense in which Sergei needs to connect to the importance of the body in relationship to the work he’s being asked to do, his mission. So maybe it would be good – especially right now – to feel a connection to the back – that’s already been given as a part of this. But can there be a connection to the back when Sergei is talking to somebody? – anybody – because it does get lost there.

The back is the axis of stability. If you don’t put your back into it, not very much is possible. So, there definitely needs to be a focus which can be continued after this session. Practice coming back to the back often – especially in relationship to each person in Sergei’s life. Sense the back. Be close to the back. And with the question, the implicit question: Is the affinity present or absent? Is it weak or strong? In doing this there can be a learning? The direction in life can be clearer.

Plus there’s a connection between the breathing and the back. It can be felt right now in this moment.

Maybe there still needs to be some diversion, some lightness as well. It’s not good to be too heavy. So maybe some badass relationships are ok but in general there is a mission at stake here which is unfolding as it should. But it would be really good for the ordinary consciousness to know something about it – which it will do now from having had the session. And there’s a sound recording also.

There is something to be learned here about relationship – not easy on this planet. It is much easier off this planet. But Sergei is here for a purpose so this is something that needs to be learned very deeply. And it’s very helpful that the higher consciousness knows that and communicates it.

Sergei: We thank you. We thank you and yes, this event can be moved on now.

Jack: Yes, I think we need to draw the event to a close.

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(Copyright © Jack Cain 2017, text and images)

Alfred: In the last session I experienced the agony of separation when suffering a total loss. There was something that could not separate, that could not differentiate because it didn’t have the necessary or required refinement in perception of what constitutes a loss on the functional level. The source of the agony is proceeding from the ordinary mind which projects the loss of connection on the source.

Jack: There’s so much that happened there!

Alfred: What was given was actually a direct teaching that the unbearable feeling of loss, of total loss, of being unable to go on, was the opening that was needed in order to make contact with the source. In such a case, I am penetrated by the higher perspective and there is no separation, no loss.

Jack: I was speaking to a client yesterday about our dual nature. We are definitely human with lots of attachments and then another part of us, in another body, can be in a completely different place.

Alfred: Yes.

Jack: We have to somehow find this line in between the two. We don’t want to fall completely into either.

Alfred: Exactly

Jack: If we fall completely into the other reality, we’re not incarnated any more – we’re not participating in what we’re supposed to be doing here. On the other hand, if we fall completely into the planetary body and the emotions… And we do – all the time.

Alfred: Yes.

Jack: We then find ourselves completely tied up in knots about something.

Alfred: What you’re saying is important in the sense that it highlights the fact that the contact between those two natures is suffering. We are suffering because we have two natures – it’s built into our existence. This can give a very different view about suffering.

That resonance of suffering that we all share puts us really in the same boat with everyone around us. [pause]

At times I am stuck and at other times, thanks to our guides, I am unstuck. I can feel things become deeper and heavier but when I see from that luminous place where this is recognized there is no separation – all is lawfully coexisting.

Jack: Exactly. You’ve certainly had moments when the separation, the suffering was not there at all.

Alfred: When everything is permeated by this fine vibration, the word “suffering” is completely unfitting to describe the experience.

Jack: Yes, because then you’re really somewhere else.

I’ve sometimes felt that the suffering was a kind of fire – a burning away of something that needs to be burned away inside. When that takes place, there’s a freedom to move into this other space. You can’t move as long as you’re taken by whatever it is that you’re suffering.


Alfred: It feels right to accept being in this body with all its tensions and densities, to just be with it.

Jack: At the same time my sense is that something has begun – a process has begun. [pause]

Alfred: I’m asking the body to cooperate… like a baby or like a dog that is terribly worried about being abandoned. So, there’s a certain need to be with it. It needs to receive a certain acceptance which then allows it to relax and to open up even when it doesn’t know what it is opening to. [pause]

The need to know is diminished.

And with that there’s a certain benevolent, unknown, perhaps stellar darkness that is present. [pause]

Much more willingly than any time before, something in me is accepting the recognition that the display of random images is not where the movement is. It’s like being on a train – you can be taken by the passing landscapes or you can be one with the movement of the train and know that you are travelling. So here I need to focus on the movement of transition and not be distracted. [pause]

The breath seems to take over and do its own breathing. [pause]

It’s very hard to describe this huge structure on the side of a mountain where there are people living. I’m looking at a place that has a lot of domes over some kind of structure.

Jack: Transparent domes?

Alfred: No, they seem to be golden. [pause]

A moment ago, something from within my experience, a kind of helper was encouraging me to pay attention to everything. [pause]

It seems very important to pay attention to feeling. That’s the guidance. How to balance all those visuals which are very striking but they can be distracting. [pause]

Jack: Yes, I think the feelings help in making sure you’re on the right track or direction.

Alfred: The heart is more present now – in its rhythm. There is a kind of trust in the guidance from the heart. [pause]

There’s a gentle discipline applied to not falling into images and fragments and just staying with the question of how to come closer. How to stay just with that sense of the proximity to some guidance and connection. It’s like a part that is moving towards the whole. Or opening to the whole. Like a planet moving towards its sun. [pause]

That familiar sense of the head insisting to lead. I need to allow that and not fight it.

Jack: Yes, just ignore it; don’t fight it.

Alfred: I’m moving within a whole circulatory system. It’s like being a particle within an infinitely intricate systems of vessels – a circulatory system in which I’m a particle. I have a sense that I’m moving in a liquid. I can see it all around me. I’m within it and outside of it.

The walls of the vessels are transparent but the transparency varies with my ability to concentrate. When I lose my focus they become opaque and I can no longer find my direction. [pause]

Again, this transition through a dream-like state. I’m not looking at it – it has passed. I continue to be in question.

Jack: And the connection to the heart, to feeling – is that still strong?

Alfred: It fluctuates but it’s still there. There are moments when the head seem to take over the heart. And I fall for that so I need to be very vigilant.

The discernment of the heart and the mind are sometimes difficult. But now I’m closer to the heart.

Jack: Good. [pause]

Alfred: There’s a clear need to let go of this wish to make something happen. I see this as a big obstacle right now. The last session was so striking that there’s a wish to replicate it. So I’m not entirely sincere or open at this moment.

Jack: Well, I think the heart needs to tell you what you need to move towards.

Alfred: Yes. There are some twinges of fear more present now and that affirms moving closer to something more real. [pause]

There’s the very strong grasp of a fear like claustrophobia. Of being entombed. I see a barrier to entering a dark place. It’s like a fear of death, very specifically. I just need to stay with that. [pause]

Something lets go now.

Jack: Ah.

Alfred: It’s like the heart is beginning to connect to another circulation. [pause]

There’s a kind of happiness at finding this blue medium again. It’s a little lighter than the usual dark blue. It seems to be my home, my base and my nutrients all in one.

Jack: Are you just aware of that now.

Alfred: Yes. It’s appearing now. It’s like an atmosphere. A liquid atmosphere.

The constriction of the heart is gradually loosening. Expanding. And the body is breathed by this blue materiality.

There’s a part of me that recognizes the same difficulty of passing through this gate of death so to speak. And it complains: “Why can’t it be easier?” Nothing that I know is helping.

It is like being under water and breathing – from the mind’s point of view. The body has absolutely no problem. This other body that I’m in here and now.

There’s light coming in. It’s like coming from a depth of water into the light. [pause]

I’m not quite ready to receive the light. It’s overwhelmingly blinding. [pause]

The head is very alive with vibration now. [pause]

It is given information, instructions which I cannot report about. It’s not something that language can…

Jack: More like a download?

Alfred: Yes. It needs to be given time and space.

Jack: Yes. Of course. [pause]

Alfred: There’s the beginning of a feeling of gratitude. As if I’m joining a gathering in a big dome. All of this preparation has made me worthy or able to participate in that. A perfectly round dome. Enormous. A gathering of people sitting.

It seems like that dome has a particular purpose – perhaps to concentrate vibrations. [pause]

I notice a constriction around the heart. It is very telling – almost like a reminder of that fear. I need to be very sensitive to that because what preceded it was a kind of realization that I have a part to play in this gathering. Maybe an important part. And then there was that constriction, almost a flinching from that – like a fear. As if I’m refusing to take my place. Or that I’m fearful of taking my place. [pause]

Jack: But there’s a part of you that knows what your place is…

Alfred: Yes. And it feels like I know something that I claim not to know.

Jack: Exactly.

Alfred: Unless I accept that, there’s no movement forward. There’s no other choice. That’s what needs to happen. There’s an image of a kind of procedure or surgery – some technical knowledge that I have received and that I need to apply. It has great importance I think. I’m taking my place on the dais there next to other personages, people of some authority. They seem to recognize me, accept me and make room for me. And with that, the constriction around the heart is releasing.

This might be the right time to ask for guidance. I feel like I need help in trusting what is required of me. To trust what was given to me to do. So I ask for that for the benefit of whoever might be benefitting from this action that I need to take. [pause]

The feeling is that if I was clearer about my heart and what needs to take place, I would not be conflicted about having to perhaps condemn or abandon… making some kind of judgment or action that will take life out of some people. I don’t have a better way of saying that. Something that will determine the fate of others which is difficult because I know them well and care about them. In some ways, I see them as the people or the creatures or the beings that I know, and I cannot do what is right. I’m seeking, praying for a vision that will allow me to see through those appearances. The appearances obscure the action that needs to take place. It’s so clear. [pause]

It’s like everything that was solid is beginning to vibrate and turn into particles. [pause]

Jack: And inside you what is happening?

Alfred: There’s a greater clarity about certain blockages or dark places where vibrations will not flow. They require some direction. [pause]

I’m not connected enough to the source to take this action.

From this state where there was this sense of a barrier, now there is no longer a barrier. It’s a total change of perspective – one that is not of my doing, not coming from my desperate striving. Light is coming through. Blinding light. Or golden. And there’s a crimson in it. [pause]

I’m beginning to see the crown. There’s an expression of gratitude towards me which touches me very deeply. [pause]

It’s no different than the previous session except that this time it’s experienced from the side of the savior and there’s no difference. Looking at the altar that is now empty from the eye of the one who transmuted that child. With only a little resistance. The whole company is seeing endless light both individuals and particles, vibrations.

Jack: When you say the whole company you mean everyone under this dome?

Alfred: Yes, exactly. [pause]

It’s like my body, my physical body is making itself known, lying here, simultaneous with that scene still there. It’s not there and here, they are both here.

And there’s a beginning dread and agony of knowing that this will dissipate as I speak. It’s very important for me to not lose touch with the heart.

Jack: Yes, and I think also to know that apparently immovable obstacles can be overcome.

Alfred: There’s clearly a need for a whole new relationship with the heart. The heart is much closer to the source than the mind. [pause]

Other postings in this series: Bodies, Bluish, The Cosmic Cleanup Team, The Joy of Taking My Place, Rescue & Ascension, A Continuity of Being, Creation, Rescue, The Empty Seat at the Table, Toxic Green, Pristine Stillness, What is Breathing?, Merging with the Light, The Alchemy of Transmuting Blue to White, Ascension, Montségur, Flood, Connecting Upward, The Thread, Ruby Eyes, Montségur 2, Quetzalcoatl, What We Have Bodies For, Slave Ships, Planetary Signs and Universal Perspectives, The Altar of Gold, The Breath Can Touch the Mind, The Battlefield That Has No End, The Quick and the Dead, The Relay Station, There Is No Difference, The Uninterrupted Chain of Beings Ascending, Adjusting a Planet’s Orbit, Our Living Planet, Body and Soul, In the Situation Room, Dark Blue Stellar Material, A Luminous Source, Where Life Resides, Suffering.

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Where Life Resides

(Copyright © Jack Cain 2017, text and images)

Alfred: It’s almost as if the mind is re-setting. All kinds of fragments and associations of the day are discharged and have to pass – like waste material. So that something can empty and begin to open up or lead to some different kind activity in the head brain. [pause]

A very familiar sensation. The body on the couch is also a body but there’s a body floating above it that is horizontal. It’s not the same body as the body on the couch. It’s half in light and half in darkness. Equally. Horizontally. With darkness above it.

Jack: And I think what’s very significant is you’re able to speak about that without disturbing the perception. It takes time and practice to be able to do that.

Alfred: Yes. [pause]

There is a clear sense of a need to let go further to allow the body to completely transform. And some trepidation, reluctance in the chest area. It seems to hold back. No, maybe it’s the opposite; maybe something is waking up in the chest.

Now there seems to be a very strong sensation at the top of the head and in the solar plexus as if there’s a kind of communication that’s being established between these two centers.

Jack: Good.

Alfred: It seems as though the floating body is gaining in substance.

A new kind of confidence is not rushing and is letting the process really take whatever time it takes. [pause]

The heaven above reminds me of a very deep blue like before sunset, before it gets completely dark. Very alive. I’m clearly part of that. It feels I belong in that medium. [pause]

There’s no fear. [intonation of surprise or wonder]

There’s a kind of trust in waiting which is a new experience.

Jack: Yes, and it’s good there’s no fear. That’s been a real obstacle before.

Alfred: Yes. [pause]

I glimpse occasionally how fear doesn’t belong in an experience like that. But it’s more a lack of skill, a lack of familiarity that is creating the fear. Fear is not from within that experience. It’s quite natural to be open to this kind of influence. [pause]

It’s almost like I’m identifying all the natural organs or apparatuses that are there for the purpose of transitioning to a different body, a different way of being. And a question is really emerging about the aim of that. And with that, in a natural way, it progresses to a more and more sincere question about guidance, about a wish to serve this… to put this state at the service of something that is necessary. So I’m asking for guidance or a guide to…

Jack: …yes, that’s good…

Alfred: …to help, because otherwise it can be lost on some kind of titillation rather than serving something for which it is designated and is necessary.

Jack: I’m reminded of the time you were told by one of the blue beings, “I can’t meet you unless you at least come to here.”

Alfred: Yes.

Jack: It’s very good that you’re asking again right here specifically.

Alfred: It’s very close to exactly what I was feeling. Have I gone as far as I need to? Have I made enough of a journey so that I can honestly and sincerely ask for help? [pause]

There’s a feeling that begins to awaken in the contact with a profound lack. [pause] I’m being shown how the holding in my back, in areas of the body where I wasn’t aware that there were certain tensions and how a kind of grasping are the obstacles that must be let go of. [pause]

Hmm. A light is beginning to come in. It’s like a whole different level of emptiness. It is necessary to receive that. [pause]

It’s interesting that, while I wasn’t considering myself empty enough, a light is being received as if it’s more available and generous than I would have expected. It almost feels like it is searching me more than I am searching for it. [pause]

It’s now that the breathing begins to be important. [pause]

The head vibrates strongly. [long pause]

I saw someone in a crimson gown… a gown, a robe… shimmering… approaching… It’s like a meeting point of three dimensions. Just on that point I see it. At a distance but approximating a point where the three dimensions of the cube meet.

It’s kind of identical to the image of Jesus in Toledo cathedral, except that it looks alive. [pause]

It feels like a very steep kind of way to get to him – those dimensional lines… inside a cube… With him at one corner. [pause]

It’s interesting that my feet seem to be not my feet. They have sandals. Like Biblical sandals. I see the edges of a white robe that I’m wearing – it has a gold margin on it.

Jack: As if as you proceed the vision becomes clearer – you see more.

Alfred: Yes. Something begins to become more concentrated in the experience.

Very different feet. Feet that are calloused and used to walking on rocks.

Jack: Used in a very different way than the current ones.

Alfred: Yes. It’s as if I’m carrying something. [intonation of surprise] I’m really going to focus on the sensation.

Jack: Yes. Just concentrate on the sensation I would say. [pause]

Alfred: The progression towards the Jesus person in the crimson robes – luminous – is very specifically, very precisely downwards, as if I’m descending from a mountain. My feet are very skilled in following some kind of track, a trail that is not very well marked with rocks. It’s desert type of place. I have a very strong impulse to say it’s Mount Sinai, Jebel Musa. I feel a kind of familiarity with that scenery. Almost a kind of coming down with the tablets from the mountain… the mind is kind of…

Jack: Yes, the mind may provide that but you have the sensation of carrying something nevertheless, right?

Alfred: Something is carried and it’s carried very carefully and precisely. Great responsibility to bring it down to that person who expects me at the end of that cube.

Jack: Ah! So there’s still a sense of the cube?

Alfred: Yes. It feels like moving inside a dimension of time. Like the all-quarter-maintainer of that particular quarter of the universe.

The body feels very strong and sure of its footing.

It’s a white robe that wraps my head as well. I sense that.

Jack: Yes, you need those kind of clothes in that environment. [pause]

Alfred: It seems like what I’m carrying is more like a body of someone, something. Feelings begin to come. Feelings of sadness, deep sadness. Someone who I care deeply about may have passed – the one I’m carrying. It could be a younger person, a child; it could be another adult.

Jack: Yes, it may gradually become clear who it is.

And are you carrying it towards this other figure?

Alfred: Yes. I say a Jesus-type figure. I am serving in some way. There is a clear intention. I am bringing it to him for a particular ritual or procedure – something that is essential to provide a safe passage for that spirit.

Failing is not an option. No matter how long the path is. The feet are sure. There’s a certain wisdom or skillfulness in the body that knows exactly what needs to happen. And how I need to bring that body before him.

Jack: Good.

Alfred: There’s a stronger vibration and light as I approach. There is great grief. Perhaps a child. My images go ahead of my words.

Jack: Careful.

Alfred: I’m seeing the images. The child is being laid down on the altar. The child body.

His eyes turn to me… Jesus’ eyes… that holy person’s eyes turn towards me with this compassion, deep compassion. [voice shaking] It pierces my heart. All three are so one. [pause]

There’s a simultaneous complete clarity about the need to let go of that boy and complete confidence that his passage will be assured in some way. All the hopes and all the love that I have for this child have to be let go. [crying]

I’m able to stay with that, thanks to this ongoing look that keeps me right there on that spot. [pause]

The solidity of the body of that child seems lessened… more and more… gradually it vanishes in a natural way. The altar seems to be empty.

I’m given so much and so much is taken at the same time.

It’s letting the heart remain open. [pause]

I see that the memory of that look is almost replacing that look of the Christ, of that sacred individual. As if I still cling to that and as if something is being instructed. It’s available to you only when everything else is lost. And now you don’t need that. It’s like calling it in vain. In vain.

Jack: So that’s a specific instruction.

Alfred: Yes.

Jack: Very clear. And reduces in no way the value of what you received.

Alfred: No. Not at all. It even amplifies it. Clarifying when it’s available and when it’s not. What the conditions are under which this benevolence, this benediction is there for me. [pause]

It feels like I’m gradually coming down from that experience in a very particular way. With a… coming up… It’s not clear but… This is like… a shell of this body that needs to be tended to and carried along although it’s not where life resides. This is not what is alive. But it needs to be carried around and… although, in spite of the fact that life, prior to this, has lost its purpose. [intonation of depression] It cannot be about what it was prior to what I just experienced. There’s a reluctance. There’s an agony about the lost contact with the source.

Jack: Do you want to ask for some guidance about that?

Alfred: Yes.

Please. Show yourself to me. I can’t go on. [pause]

I receive help. The pain I took for estrangement is the connection. So clearly. [pause]

What a gift!

Jack: Yes!

Other postings in this series: Bodies, Bluish, The Cosmic Cleanup Team, The Joy of Taking My Place, Rescue & Ascension, A Continuity of Being, Creation, Rescue, The Empty Seat at the Table, Toxic Green, Pristine Stillness, What is Breathing?, Merging with the Light, The Alchemy of Transmuting Blue to White, Ascension, Montségur, Flood, Connecting Upward, The Thread, Ruby Eyes, Montségur 2, Quetzalcoatl, What We Have Bodies For, Slave Ships, Planetary Signs and Universal Perspectives, The Altar of Gold, The Breath Can Touch the Mind, The Battlefield That Has No End, The Quick and the Dead, The Relay Station, There Is No Difference, The Uninterrupted Chain of Beings Ascending, Adjusting a Planet’s Orbit, Our Living Planet, Body and Soul, In the Situation Room, Dark Blue Stellar Material, A Luminous Source, Where Life Resides.


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